Witches Brew by russ mckay
Posted on October 27, 2023
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There was an ugly old witch of a thing
That simply loved her soup cooking
Her concoctions were feared
‘Cause they really were weird
And the stench to your eyes, tears would bring
Well one day she cooked up a brew
That she called “spell casting stew”
It had an eye of a newt
And an old union suit
She put spiders legs in there too
She threw in a roadkill skunk
I tell you that soup really stunk!
There were two pigeon claws
And three cat’s hair balls
It was a thick creamy gunk!
Well she stirred and it boiled without halt
If it wasn’t nasty it wasn’t her fault
She made a cauldron of goop
But when I tasted the soup
I thought that it needed more salt!
I Love Ewe by russ mckay
Posted on October 23, 2023
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The old Ram was eating his lunch
Munching grass blades by the bunch
But then his farmyard wife came by
The ram stopped eating to just say “Hi”
She had been shorn that morn of her wonderful wool
And she felt not as pretty and a bit of a fool
But the Ram hubby knew just what to do
And said ” You look beautiful and I love EWE.”
My New Backpack by russ mckay
Posted on October 17, 2023
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My parents bought me a new backpack for school
It’s pink and lilac and looks really cool
The first morning it was loaded with lunch, school supplies and stuff
And anything I’d need to be sure I had enough
I was ready to go as I stood at our door
My backpack so full it wouldn’t hold any more
Mommy put it on me and fastened the last strap
And when she stepped away I fell flat on my back
My brother came over to help me up on my feet
And as I turned around I knocked him right on his seat
Mommy helped me unload about half of the stuff
So that carrying the thing wouldn’t be quite so tough
I learned you’ve really got to be strong when you’re starting school
And I think it might help if you owned your own mule
Sirens
Posted on October 11, 2023
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Sirens fascinate me
When I hear them getting louder
If I could drive an ambulance
I could not be any prouder
“Woop, woop, woop”
And “Dee Daw, Dee Daw”
I would make the siren blast
I’d rush through downtown traffic
I’d drive carefully, but fast
Yes I would like to drive an ambulance
A job where time’s well spent
I’d love to be the driver
But not the occupant!
“Stinky Feet” by russ mckay
Posted on October 5, 2023
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I know it’s not neat
To have stinky feet
But pretty often I do
Inside my sneakers
The airflow is weaker
And my socks start smelling like poo
Yes after each shower
I smell like a flower
I’m clean from head to toe
But it doesn’t take long
My aroma goes wrong
And that clean smell I had gets “so so”
The bad smell I get
Comes from the sweat
They say it’s a phase I’ll outgrow
I take my socks off each day
Even dogs run away
As fast as their four legs can go
I have learned a lot
From this problem I’ve got
It has something to do with where
And why your nose
Is so far from your toes
It’s so you can breathe in clean air
“I’m NOT Happy About Being A Roach.” by russ mckay
Posted on September 23, 2023
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I’m not glad that I’m a roach
Folks hate me as I approach
I’m always running for my life
Living every minute under strife
No vacations… no real home
Never the subject of a poem
What? You mean that’s no longer true?
I’m so happly …don’t know what to do!
Maybe life isn’t as bad as I might think
That vacation could be right under that sink
Ah, rest from fear and running away
And there’s a Roach Motel where I can stay
ECHO by russ mckay
Posted on September 22, 2023
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HELLO…Hello…hello…said Echo from the cave
She couldn’t but she wanted to… add a little wave
She also had to always….stay hidden from the view
And never ever speak unless she was spoken to
Though she lived in canyons, chambers and some far off hills
She never started conversations about her life on rocks and rills
Her role was to wait silently…of this she wasn’t fond
Because she had to hold her voice and only could respond
But Echo has a secret that she will never share
She whistles, yells and shouts a lot when no one else is there
The Barking Duck by sillygrandpa.com
Posted on September 16, 2023
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As I was walking in the park
I heard a loud distinctive bark
“That’s a big dog behind me I suppose”
But it was a DUCK without any clothes
He waddled and was brown with a big black beak
But I was amazed when I heard him start to speak
He got really close and said “Pardon me Sir…
But might you have a lozinger?”
Then he “barked” again that bark of his
While I looked in my bag for some lozenges
Then there in the back I found a whole pack
And as he ate them he started to quack
“Oh thank you kind Sir” and he waddled away
He quacked at the kids as he passed their way
He was quacking happily as he plunged into the pond
And I yelled out to him “Now get some clothes on!”
Mosquitos by russ mckay
Posted on September 6, 2023
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I don’t know what the mosquito’s for
Do we need malaria and an itchy welted sore?
It’s OK when you’re in the sun
But you’d better run when day is done
They say that just the females bite
Some spots you can’t go out at night
But what makes the mosquito so utterly obnoxious?
What it does with it’s hypodermical proboscis!
“Words That Do Not Rhyme”
Posted on August 25, 2023
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If you are a poet then the lines should rhyme
And make sure you do it each and every time
Unless of course you write free verse
But I can think of nothing worse
The trouble is…my most favorite color
“Orange” doesn’t rhyme with any other
Then there is “Month” that has no rhyme
I’ve tried to rhyme it many a time
So nothing really rhymes with orange
OH…OH…I put it at the end….oh…DARNGE!!!
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