PHINEAS FLEA by Russ McKay (aka sillygrandpa.com)
Posted on October 11, 2016
Filed Under Tweens | Leave a Comment
There once was a flea named Phineas
He could jump higher than the rest of us
His athletic prowess
As you might guess
Among fleas did cause quite a fuss
He also was very inventive
To other fleas he offered incentive
Join his circus they did
And they no longer hid
Circus fans were raptly attentive
Phineas made stars out of fleas
He…the most famous of these
Quickly became rich
Surely found his own niche
Investing those high ticket fees
Then on one weekend in spring
He did a most creative thing
He began a flea market
At an abandoned park…it
Brought crowds that loved overspending
With his wealth he lived high on the hog
Left observers of his riches agog
This poor little flea
Became rich as Lucre
He retired and bought his own dog
OPINION by Russ McKay
Posted on October 3, 2016
Filed Under Grandpa | Leave a Comment
You’re entitled to your opinion
As I am to mine
Spirited discussion borders on divine
We came to think differently…me and you
By the way we were raised and the things that we do
So tell me honestly what you think
And I’ll give you my opinion as quick as a wink
Even though sometimes I may not agree
And you may not agree with me
You will realize and it won’t take long
If I agreed with you
We’d both be wrong!
A BLANK PIECE OF PAPER by Russ McKay
Posted on September 27, 2016
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All stories always start this way
No mistakes have yet been made
The greatest tales that e’er were written
The best plans that e’er were laid
It’s the sculptor’s block of marble
The painter’s canvas white as snow
The threading of the needle
Before one starts to sew
It’s the builder’s first nail or brick
The composers first note upon the staff
The humorist’s first smiling thought
That will make his readers laugh
Blank paper is a lot like life
Make of it what we will
We each write our own life stories
Whether typed or pen or quill
THE KINGDOM OF SILLY by Russ McKay
Posted on August 31, 2016
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“May I introduce to you the King Of Silly.
To whom you always must bow willy nilly”
“And every time to him you address
Our Royal King… as “Your Sillyness!”
The Kingdom wasn’t always silly you see
It used to be as sad as any could be
Then our King one day passed a decree
“ALL subjects must at once be quite SILLY!”
Well many found it easy to be
As silly as…well as silly as he
But some like Mr. Perious
Had a difficult time not being serious
The King sent his envoy over to meet
. With Mr. Perious living on Somber Street
But it didn’t take long to correct his woes
With huge orange shoes and a big red nose
Then there was the librarian named Miss Proper
She was always serious and we couldn’t stop her
A simple solution was a feather dress
That constantly tickled…everywhere you could guess
So the Kingdom was peopled with the silliest kind
That had never a serious thought on their mind
We were all happy telling jokes and singing a song
That is…until YOU came along!
GET SILLY!
NEW BABY BROTHER by Russ McKay
Posted on August 24, 2016
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Well they finally did it!
They brought him home today
My “bouncing baby brother”
As they like to say
I saw him in the nursery
Through the window there
I couldn’t see too much of him
Just his nose, forehead and hair
I guess I’ll just get used to
Having him around
He surely is a noisy thing
When they lay him down
I was such a happy baby
I was never sad
And I’ve grown up to be a good girl
I’m very rarely bad
But I just don’t understand
Why they think they need
A messy crying baby
Another mouth to feed
I’m tall enough to peek in
His crib and bassinette
And only when he’s sleeping
That’s close as I want to get
“What’s that Mom…
Me…hold him?”
“I really don’t…oh well
He’s looking right up at me
As far as I can tell”
“So this litle thing’s my brother
He’s being quiet now
You know…I think he likes me
He just yawned…Oh wow!”
“Can’t I just keep holding him
I like the way he feels
And his blue eyes are real pretty
They’re as big as seals”
“So…Hi there brother Billy
It’s almost time for lunch
I’m your sister Cathy
And I love you very much!”
SIRENS by Russ McKay
Posted on August 18, 2016
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Sirens fascinate me
When I hear them getting louder
If I could drive an ambulance
I could not be any prouder
“Woop, woop, woop”
And “Dee Daw, Dee Daw”
I would make the siren blast
I’d rush through downtown traffic
I’d drive carefully, but fast
Yes I would like to drive an ambulance
A job where time’s well spent
I’d love to be the driver
But not the occupant!
MOSQUITOS by Russ McKay (aka sillygrandpa.com)
Posted on August 10, 2016
Filed Under Teens | Leave a Comment
I don’t know what the mosquito’s for
Do we need malaria and an itchy welted sore?
It’s OK when you’re in the sun
But you’d better run when day is done
t They say that just the females bite
Some spots you can’t go out at night
But what makes the mosquito so utterly obnoxious?
What it does with it’s hypodermical proboscis!
The Ghost Of Endicott McNair by Russ McKay
Posted on July 25, 2016
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I was invited to a grand estate
Which I thought was really great
The huge front doors swung open wide
But when I looked…there was no one inside
The house was empty or so I thought
I held up the invitation that I had brought
Then a voice from nowhere said “Welcome”
“I’m the butler…enter…I’m Malcolm”
I saw no butler or any other sole
But I went in as I was told
“Master will be with you very soon”
I looked around the empty room
“HELLO!” a loud voice behind me said
“I see you’re living…well we’re all dead!”
“Glad you came I’m Endy McNair”
Then he sat in a chair…that wasn’t there
“We’ve had guests but very few”
“In fact this year there’s been only you”
“Well you write rhymes for girls and boys”
“The tween ones are wonderful joys”
“But they all seem to be afraid of us”
“By the way isn’t your name Russ?”
“Ah yes it is as you wrote on your invite”
“Malcolm wrote that…I can’t write!”
“Well we want you to compose a rhyme to tell
Your readers We Aren’t Scary and We Don’t Smell!”
It’s true he wasn’t scary and the air didn’t stink
And about that time I started to think
Ghosts do get a lot of bad press
So I’ll write a poem and do my best…
To dispell the rumor that all ghosts are mean
And it was then that I left the scene
The big doors opened and it was time
To rush on home and write this rhyme
FAME by Russ McKay
Posted on July 24, 2016
Filed Under Grandpa | Leave a Comment
I was admittedly proud when I heard the news
I said “Well someone FINALLY agrees I have paid my dues!”
They would feature my picture in a national ad
So I sent them the best one that I had
I waited with great anticipation
The long two months until publication
It is samples viagra check for more easy to use as one just needs to consume as it is prescribed before the lovemaking session. But loss of libido is check for more info order generic viagra a reality. Changing the diet doesn’t necessarily equal dieting, although you may want to lose some weight and stay in shape. cialis discount canada continue reading for source Buy Kamagra Now Easy & Convenient The availability of this medicine has made ED treatment approachable for every ED patient. wouroud.com generic viagra Then the day finally came and so did the mail
The nation would see me and all would hail
I flipped through the pages and there it was
At first happy but my mood changed because
Although I got what I was looking for
Under my picture it just read “BEFORE”
MISTER RIGHT by Russ McKay (aka sillygrandpa.com)
Posted on July 20, 2016
Filed Under Grandpa | Leave a Comment
I’m in a plight
I’m always right
That’s good you might suppose
But most people shy
Away from a guy
Who’s sure of what he knows
It can be humbling
When someone’s stumbling
To remember a trivial clue
The answer I’ll shout
And as I get it out
They get angry and glare at you
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Helpful you see”
But you’ve not won a friend
I’d gain so much more
Saying “That’s a tough one for sure!”
I’d be better off in the end
So be thankful that you
Don’t have this curse too
It’s not to be lightly taken
I once thought I was wrong
But it didn’t take long
To realize I was mistaken!
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