FAME by Russ McKay aka sillygrandpa.com
Posted on June 30, 2017
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I was admittedly proud when I heard the news
I said “Well someone FINALLY agrees I have paid my dues!”
They would feature my picture in a national ad
So I sent them the best one that I had
I waited with great anticipation
The long two months until publication
Then the day finally came and so did the mail
The nation would see me and all would hail
I flipped through the pages and there it was
At first happy but my mood changed because
Although I got what I was looking for
Under my picture it just read “BEFORE”
My Shopping Trip by Russ McKay
Posted on June 24, 2017
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After days and days of pleading
Mommy took me out to shop
For all kinds of pretty things
And I could hardly stop
She bought my frilly brand new dress
With ruffles and blue bows
She bought me a new necklace
And my first pantyhose
You should see the shoes I got
A patent leather pair
And then I picked out blue barretts
That look dainty in my hair
I couldn’t wait to get back home
We shopped ’til way past three
I quickly changed into my jeans
And went and climbed a tree!
The Frog And The Dog by Russ McKay
Posted on June 13, 2017
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There once was a dog whose best friend was a frog
A very unusual fraternity
A dog should try to always stay dry
But a frog…as wet as can be
The dog would bark as he ran ’round the park
And the frog would croak as he took stroke after stroke
They would smile as they watched each other
And often they’d sit quietly by to just gaze at the sky
The point being…that they were together
But it was a shame that neither one had a name
You see… they both were orphans
But when together… no matter the weather
Their brains pumped out endomorphins
Then one said to the other..”We’re unlikely brothers”
And the other quite quickly agreed
Then they both opted to pretend they’re adopted
A case they could easily plead
If brotherhood they would claim they needed a name
One that conveyed family strength
They thought hard and long
Dismissed ideas that were wrong
Then finally after great length…
They shook paw and claw
Barked… croaked.. and stood tall
Shouting their new names to the land
“I’m BULLDOG” and “I’m BULLFROG”
“Brotherhood…ahh ain’t it GRAND!!!”
LANDING CATS by Russ McKay
Posted on June 2, 2017
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Here’s a fact about felines that’s really neat
Most breeds of cats land on their feet
You can drop them…or they can fall from a tree
Just watch and you’ll see them land on their feet
There WAS one breed of cats that would land on their head
They were very pretty cats but they are all dead
Fred’s Lost Head by Russ McKay
Posted on May 28, 2017
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Big shouldered Fred
Had lost his whole head
And of course, can’t see to find it
He can’t hear it either
And he’s lost his breather
He’s found a chair and he’s feeling behind it
Well it didn’t roll there
It could be anywhere
He really needs my help the big lug
I asked how he lost it
Had he just tossed it?
But those shoulders he’d just shrug
We searched all around
In the trees…on the ground
Until I heard a voice start to yell
“I’m way down here
I’ve a headache severe”
Fred’s head had rolled down the well
We slowly lowered the pail
His head continued to wail
“Hurry or I’m gonna drown!”
“Keep your chin up Fred”
And then he said
“I’m so glad that I have been found”
Well we bailed out his head
And replaced it for Fred
On his shoulders where it needs to stay
“Remember Fred
When you lose your head
I’m your friend and I’ll be on the way”
“Until you dropped the rope
I had given up hope
I had replaced it with dread”
I said “You must never lose hope
No never say nope
Never quit when you are a head!”
HAPPY POET by Russ McKay
Posted on May 22, 2017
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It’s fun writing poems for kids
They love to laugh and giggle
And when you read your poems to them
They’ll listen close not wriggle
Well most of them do anyway
Some kids are hard to please
But I guess that I just like them all
“God bless you! Did you sneeze?”
“Now Johnny stop your hitting Sue
And Jimmy please sit up
I’m trying to read you all this poem
Try not to interrupt”
“As I was reading earlier
Oh…now I’ve lost my place
Does someone here remember?”
Each kid was just blank faced
“I guess I’ll just start over”
“Please Mister don’t do that
Could you skip on to the end
Read that short one ’bout the cat”
I like writing poems for children
Yes I really do
I love to make them happy
And they are…when I am through!
Swimming In The Sea by Russ McKay
Posted on May 16, 2017
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I’m not the biggest fan of swimming in the ocean
It’s mostly cold and salty and removes your tanning lotion
I’ll just sit here upon the shore and watch the others swim
It’s fun to see the little ones for the first time going in
Out there’s a place where sharks and fast rip tides abound
The shore is much the safer place… they can’t reach you on high ground
The sand is soft between my toes…my book begs to be read
My new sunglasses should stay dry and so should my bald head
Yes I much prefer to spectate atop granulated turf
But I understand the fun and charm of swimming in the surf
When you think of all the things that you and yours can do in it
Just remember all those fish out there…go number one and two in it!
My Little Guest by Russ McKay
Posted on May 9, 2017
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Our weekend guests brought their little child
He was most gentle, meek and mild
He only did what he was told to do
And every sentence he’d end “Thank You”
He was unlike any other boy
He was a total supreme joy
He washed his hands without being told
Yet he was only eight years old
Always smiling every chore he’d do
And everything he said was true
He’d say “Yes M’aam” and “Yes Sir” too
He behaved the best the weekend through
I was amazed by this little lad
The best guest I have ever had
It was a pleasure to even know him
I’d trust him far as I could throw him!
TAILLESS CATS by Russ McKay
Posted on May 3, 2017
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Did you know there is a breed
Of cats that have no tails?
It took a lot of research
Seeing why this trait prevails
It happened many years ago
On porches by the sea
Upon an Island known as Man
It was said to be
The people there were restful
Loved to watch the scenery
But the people were out numbered
Friendly felines seemed to be…
Always near the old folks
Taking in the view
The cats would laze along porch floors
As cats are prone to do
But it started causing problems
There was screeching everywhere
So the felines cut their tails off
To avoid those rocking chairs!
Living In A Shoe by Russ McKay
Posted on April 25, 2017
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There once was a family named Bleeker
All six of them lived in a sneaker
It was a giant size
And their home they did prize
But when it rained it was a leaker
When they bought it they got a good deal
But the problems they had were quite real
When the rain started in
“Let the mopping begin!”
Mrs. Bleeker would yell from the heel
The kids thought the house was real neat
Living there was a real feat
The roof had this big hole
Staying dry the main goal
They would never give up in defeat
In summer the sneaker got hot
Air conditioning they had not!
And you couldn’t go
Down into the toe
That room smelled bad as it got!
When the Bleekers grew up, moved away
The sneaker began to decay
It was torn down
And they built on that ground
A new high heeled pump that was gray!
